Recently noticed that I miss her in every beat of my heart and in every breath I take. Time passes but freezes on her memory. I remember each and every moment of our last meet. She sitting on that high back chair in the cafe and mocking me while sipping some green apple drink.

I feel her all around me, on every step on a stair I feel her feet next to mine and on every turn of stair her lips. In the mirror, she stands parallel to me, smiling sometimes, sometimes just happy inside.

I don't call her now a days and let her be in her fairy world but I feel her present. I feel when she is cheerful and when the drop comes from her eyes. She shares my heart and own the most part of it. The picture of her sticking on my almirah with a fridge magnet keep reminding me the old her. I miss the old her and I am sure she misses that too.

I believe the phone will ring again with her ringtone and I will hear that name again, the name she used to call me and we take another trip down the stairs.

This paragraph is a part of Ferris Wheel series. You can read the rest here: 
http://www.iandpeople.com/search?q=Ferris+wheel

This paragraph is a part of Ferris Wheel series. You can read the rest here:
http://www.iandpeople.com/2013/03/ferris-wheel.html

Her sensual voice woke me up teasing and giving me chills. She singing the song

“Kya dekhte ho”

“Kya chahte ho”

and me madly forgetting the lyrics trying to complete it and then her angry looks. 

Every love story has those heart touching songs and this was our song. We used to sing together and have our small romantic moments:

“Kya dekhte ho”

“Surat tumhari”

“Kya chahte ho”

“Chahat tumhari”

“Na jo mai Kehdu”

“Kehna sakogi”

“Lagti nahi neeyat theek tumhari”

and we used to laugh together after this. 

She never liked me as a singer and I reluctantly agreed that she sings better than me because I wanted this everyday. Who in this world wouldn’t like to wake like that? 

and what about the rest of the days when she gets me a bedside tea (which she hated) and trying to wake me up, holding my hand carefully, very carefully, slightly bending over the sleepy me and putting my fingers in that very cup. 

“Aaaahhhhhh” the screaming me

and with the devil smile she singing 

“Kya dekhte ho...”

That was the second time I drank beer. I was upset and cursing myself for all what I had done for her. I was angry at myself. I even cried. It was almost one year since we met. I didn't give up any chance of understanding her. She too understood me but was not taking my feelings seriously. But on the other side I was melting and burning in her love. Finally I decided to not to talk with her ever. I went to Suresh and told him all about what happened. Suresh was the person who always supported me timely and encouraged my faith in love. When I told him everything even he advised me to leave her. My mind took his advice seriously but heart was in pain. Suresh was an occasional drinker. I told him I want to drink so that my soul get relaxed. That soul who always hated drinkers. We bought two bottles of beer with chips and sat inside Suresh's room. He played soft music on his speakers. The light was dim. He made all the environment set. After drinking I headed toward my room. He followed me saying I would fall down. He dropped me to my room and again I started to open my broken heart's pieces and told him my decision. He understood my situation completely and forced me to make the last call. I called but nobody answered. Suresh went to his room. I was alone and in some effect of beer. I tried again because I badly wanted to hear her voice. This time she picked up.
" Hi"
"Hey"
"You didn't called me from the whole day. what happened??? Everything alright???"
She didn't know what she has done to me. Her last words again came in my head and a wave of pain striked into it. So I started directly.
"This is the last time I am asking you and I won't be there in your life more to ask you again"
After this  told her everything, every moment we had spent together and my efforts behind those moments to make them special ones. I started from the first day and ended at the last talk we had.
She was silent, just listening to me.
" Either you will be mine or I will be gone from your life forever and today forever means forever"
" I will think over it. I need time"
" I can't give you months or years like I had given you before. Tell me now"
" OK I will tell you tomorrow"
" I will call you in the morning, bye"
That night I didn't wished her good night. That was the first time in  nine months...

               to be continued....

© Abhishek Dudeja 2013

mail@iandpeople.com

"Yes ! I care for her, care than this damn whole world. If she will ever get upset, I will make her smile even if I need to loose my happiness. My soul is meant for her. She lives in it. She owns it. She is my love, my God , my passion. She is that star, the constant one, twinkling in the sky, who inspires me to decorate the words with feelings in the heart and take me with herself to the new but still the known world. "

A DIALOGUE FROM MY NEXT STORY

Copyrights Abhishek Dudeja

mail@iandpeople.com

Image credit : yaymicro.com